{The picture kept will remind me.}

When I see pictures of us that are from when we were together, it still messes me up inside.

I still see you in real life from time to time, but the images I have of us are what get me the most.

I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because it turned out so much different than I wanted it to.

Maybe someday I will be able to delete them, but I am not there yet.

I go on with my life because I know that things happen for a reason, and my place is obviously not with you.

I can’t help but wonder if the lessons in it all, are more than I am realizing.

Every day, I become a little bit more ok with the fact that you are gone, and were never really there to begin with.

I used to be so angry about it; now there is a certain peace in the fact that it is no longer consuming my every waking thought.

J.Rounds ©2018 ~Peaces of ME

Another Tuesday.

I have a therapy appointment today, which I need; because I’ve been acting out and feeling all hostile inside, out of frustration, anger and sadness. It’s not really a very good look on me anymore. I don’t like to escalate to this level.

It brings with it all kinds of unwanted judgement and accusations; and I’m unmotivated as fuck, to boot.

I wish I could have things the way I wanted them and not need to talk out my problems with a rent-a- friend. But I can’t have, and I do need it.

I’m grateful the option is there in my life, because I want to remain sober and moving forward. Two most important things.

Some day this void in me will close up; I hope.

J.Rounds (c)2016 ~Peaces of Me

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For Maddie, Christmas 2015.