Hashing it out with myself over the job sitch/ Thoughts about companies that don’t value their workers or pay them enough.

These are my thoughts out loud. Edited some.

I’ve been job searching for better opportunities because I need to make more income and I need a better steady paycheck coming in to get to my next goals. It’s been on-going for months now, and I’m highly frustrated.

Highly frustrated about it doesn’t touch it actually, as this is the number one thing for me on my shitlist of life right now, and has been for some time.

*My first point* I wanted to move up within my company and had hoped too. For almost a year-and-a-half, I tried hard to.

My ACTUAL reality is, that although management keeps telling me that it is possible, and they want me to become a shift-lead in the future; I can’t even get enough scheduled solid shifts (not on-call ones) to make the raise they gave me even relevant. The raise doesn’t matter, because my hours are not secure.

I’ve been at my current job for over a year-and-a-half now.

As soon as my raise took effect, my hours starting dropping. When talking repeatedly to management about it, I was basically told that I’d have to suck it up and deal with it, because training new employees and their schedules, took precedence over mine.

Really? Really.

Now let’s all guess how many of those new employees actually stayed around for more than a week, a month, two months.

Enough said.

Thanks for the loyalty work place…what I really mean is, thanks for the shaft.

*rolls eyes*

So, with that being told to me, the only thing I can hope for each week to get a full paycheck, is to pick up a shift someone won’t show up for, or one someone asks me to take. This happens almost every week; it’s every time I plan something I need to get done, or on one of my only scheduled days off.

Another really.

My time there has amounted to nothing, and it means nothing to my employers either, and I’m really starting to see it openly and at full force lately.

I’ve been saying NO to some shifts ,when usually I’d say yes on the spot, because I’m tired of it and I’m tired of feeling like I should be ok with it, when I’m not at all.

Not only can I not get a full schedule actually scheduled; I also can’t get other things in my life done because of it. I’m always at work or on-call.

It’s not worth the wear and tear on my body, the gas money it takes to get there, the time it takes out of my day for the crappy pay with no financial security. The loyalty only goes one way, and it’s not towards me, as you can plainly read.

The only thing that makes my job worth it, are the animals and the friends I’ve made.

That’s not paying my bills.

I’m not a beggar anymore, so I choose be a chooser in my future…not a settler.

All of this talk to me from management about moving up to a shift-lead eventually.

I don’t want to.

I’m not willing to take extra stress and nonsense for a dollar raise. I have enough of that there without another position, and it will triple. I’m not willing to be overworked and underpaid more than I already am, be there more than I already am, for a company that doesn’t care enough about me to see me anything other than replaceable after the loyalty and time I’ve spent on them.

YES, my time matters too.

It is extremely physical work every day. It’s frustrating to me because I work so hard. Every shift. Never call in. I work sick. I work majorly hurt sometimes. I go above what is expected on a normal basis, as that’s how I am when I’m working for someone. The only things that are ever pointed out to me, are the things I’m not doing…but it never gets pointed out to anyone else and they don’t even try half as hard as me at all.

Tired of it so much, you have no idea.

I love my dog and cat kids more than I could ever put into words. I love most of my co-workers. What I really can’t deal with anymore is the money/to BS/work factor, the lack of set hours, and the favoritism that always seems to go towards the people that don’t apply themselves at all and don’t even show up to work a good part of the time. Why do they deserve a full-time schedule, but I don’t? It took me months to get over 30 hours a week when I started, and I now I have to watch new people coming in, and being rewarded with hours just for applying for the job. I’m still fighting for over 30 hours a week.

I am tired of the whole thing.

I’m also tired of being invalidated every time I come to management with a real problem I’m having with something or someone there.

It used to be fun every day; now it’s me realizing that I need something more for my life…because I will never get the financial security I need where I’m at.

SO…..

Onto the *second point.*

I started looking for other jobs.

When looking for better jobs, It’s so frustrating to me to see the sometimes three/four part lists of things that you will have to do and be responsible for, and then the amount of pay the employer wants to pay you that never equals the workload they expect from you at all.

Like you can just imagine the BS, fucked up drama, stress, and most likely, ego-laden shitty management, that goes on at some of these places.

Just reading some of the reviews.

Jesus.

I am SO. OVER. IT.

In America; overworked, underpaid and underappreciated has become the running norm for most of the working population.

Most CEO’s build their companies off of the backs of people they don’t give two shits about, because their bottom line is making as much money as possible with the least amount of effort. Employees are replaceable. Employers know that there will always be someone who will do the job, desperate enough for any scraps of money you choose to pay them, no matter how hard or shitty the job may be. Employers know also, that they will not be doing anything remotely close to the job they are hiring for…and probably wouldn’t at all. That is why they don’t care.

*EDIT* I am not saying all companies are like this at all. I’m saying MOST ARE.

This country runs on desperation AND stupid people.

Most companies bank on this.

It sickens me, truly. It sickens me that I am forced to partake in it right now, if I want to survive.

I can’t believe some of these companies even have the balls to list the stuff they expect you to do, with the crappy-ass pay right beside it, like it’s a normal or acceptable.

My cheeks hurt.

Please let me work for you, you’re SO much more important than me Mr. Big-wig.

Fuck off.

It’s no wonder to me at all why this country is so divided, so much crime and hatred and people are scratching and clawing at every dime they can get their hands on. Most people busting their asses every day, don’t get remotely close to the money they deserve for doing it. AT ALL.

Most people in this country today are struggling just to be lower-middle class and/or poor….and that JUST. NOT. RIGHT.

The Government has NO ISSUES hooking you into the financial aid system any way they can as well. Even when we all know that degrees don’t guarantee you a good job AT ALL, and never did. BTW, please pay us our money every month for the rest of your adult life for making you think that it would. If you don’t pay us, we’ll just fuck up your credit, take your taxes and/or garnish the shitty paycheck you make anyways…so just pay us.

Thanks so much for the education. I appreciate it.

*sarcasm*

Truly, If I could curl up into a ball and disappear, I would not fight it at all.

Hear me when I say that someday, I won’t be putting up with any of this bullshit from any employer because I’ll be working for myself.

Also hear me when I say that if I had a business of my own; although success would be the ultimate goal; I’d be sure to treat any people that were helping me get there with the respect they deserved, the appreciation they deserved, and I would not hire employees if I could not or did not want to pay them what they deserved, for the job they would be doing. Also, I would not hire people who didn’t want to apply themselves and actually work.

I think the most successful companies, have employees who feel like the work they do means something, they are adequately compensated so that they can focus on doing their jobs to the best of their ability, not how they are going to be paying their basics bills or having money for food that week.

I’m over being a drone in this Matrix.

I love working. I’m a hard worker. It is not the working that is the issue for me at all.

I will do everything in my power to get to the level of not having to answer to anyone but myself.

AND make money at it.

All these slaps in the face from the world are getting old, and the bruises aren’t healing anymore.

The only way for me to fight back, is to break free of the system and to believe that I am more than just an underpaid 30-38 hr. paycheck every week.

I know I am. I just have to keep working until I can feasibly work for myself.

This is what you might be struggling with as well. I know I’m not the only one who feels like this. I also know that the choices I made in my life have led me to this point. I still wish I would have been way smarter in some of those choices.

Although I AM grateful for the good things my job brings me; the stress it brings me financial-wise, leads me to believe that it is AGAIN time to make some bigger, better choices, and to keep staying sober and keep working until the universe has no choice but to work with me for a change.

I don’t think changing jobs for a couple of bucks more is going to do anything for me at this point, but put me in another position i don’t want to be in.

Companies are ALL the same, and the bottom line is money…not me.

I’m still sober though. I’m still upright and walking. I still have beautiful children with life in them. I still have hope. I still have the dream someday that maybe all this passion and confusion in me will amount to something someday.

I just hope it happens when I’m living, and not after I’m not.

And that’s ALL the truth, as I see it.

Thanks for reading.

Love yourself.

J.Rounds ©2019 ~Peaces of ME

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