Last days of Summer are here already; it’s in the air, and undeniable.
Not sure how I feel about that.
I am five months, six days sober, and I think I’ve been doing fairly well keeping level and positive these last days.
I’ve got too many things to do, and not enough money to do it. Correction: I’ve got too many things I NEED to do, and not enough money to do it.
I decided to change my availability at the PET HOTEL to, “just let me work, I don’t care what time, or what shift.“; in hopes I can get some kind of interview, and spend my time picking up dog and cat shit and talking to animals for money; while I work on my Etsy store and photography/art projects on the side.
I know the animals will help my mood significantly, and I need the money to pay my way into financial responsibility and self-worth again.
I’ve done WAY worse things to get money. Enough said.
I’m going to stay positive about it, because I really can’t afford not to.
I’m well enough to work, I just need to do something that’s going to keep me positive.
For now I’m back to this Etsy thing….and I’m wondering if it wouldn’t be easier to just burn the shit I’m posting, instead.
I’m grateful because I know that my situation could be way worse.
I think of the people in Texas and the surrounding areas that were affected by the flooding and rain; the children and animals and all of the chaos; the fear and confusion I know those people must be feeling or must have felt.
I cannot imagine, and don’t want to.
I can’t complain about anything; because mostly I’m just pissed off at myself, my lack of responsibility for my own life, and the way I allowed myself to give up on ME.
I could tell you all my theories about what my issues are and were…but I decided to write a book instead, because it’s too deep to rattle off on a public blog all the time.
I’ve been writing every day for weeks now, consistently.
It’ll come out when I get to that stage, whenever that is, and if it helps someone in the end besides myself, then it will have been worth writing fully.
Today I’m just posting a picture of me from two days ago, so you can see I’m still taking it day by day; and still trying to be happy in the best way I can.
Please donate anywhere you are able to, to help the people of Hurricane Harvey rebuild their lives; and have the kind of aftercare, that they will need and deserve.
T and I are donating for now; but it’s got me to thinking about other ways I could help as well…and I want to.
Count your blessings every day, because you have many more than you realize.
As always, Love yourself.
J.Rounds (c)2017 ~Peaces of ME