I just have so much pain in my heart right now, for so many things.
It aches and feels like it’s never going to be ok.
I think of all the things I could have done differently and the bad choices I’ve made in my past.
I’m suffering the repercussions of some of those bad choices now. But this time, it couldn’t get any worse. My kids are gone now for good. I hate myself right now more than anything.
My heart is torn in a million pieces, and I’m all alone. I don’t care what anyone says; Hell is right here on Earth and I live in it every single day.
The last time I have been this devestated was when my son passed. It’s the same exact feeling.
Now, I have literally nothing to live for, and I don’t know what to do.
I do know I’m not giving up. Because giving up never got me anywhere.
I’m also not going to drink even though I really want to right now. Because I know that’d kill me even more.
Please say a good thought for Jenni (me) if you would please, I’d really appreciate it.
I don’t know how I’m going to get through this, but there’s no other option. Day by day I guess.
I will remember to Love myself this time. As always, I hope you will too.
J.Rounds (c)2016 ~Peaces of Me.