Although I was not drinking on a daily basis by any stretch of the imagination; I was relapsing off and on, here and there, very randomly; and everyone knew it; because you can tell when I am drunk, and on Facebook. I am a very overly happy, sloppy writing, manic compulsive, DUMB ASS. If you happen to be the same and get me in a bad mood, I become a ruthless cunt; and I do not care at all; and I am merciless.
It’s disgusting; Also embarrassing. I was tired of apologizing for my stupidity and lack of being able to cope with my issues.
I have come to the point in my life, that I no longer wish to be the disease I carry inside me; because that is not ME.
It gives me GREAT, GREAT pleasure to say, that I am today, THIRTY days clean of alcohol and all mind altering drugs, other than the prescription medicine prescribed from my Doctor, for my mental deficiencies.
I am extremely proud of myself, and I WILL continue daily to work toward making it to two months. I am very confident I can do it; as I can do anything I put my mind to; and I WILL do it.
I would like to thank each and every person that ever stood by my side, did not give up on me, and showed compassion and love to me, when I could not love myself. You know who you all are.
You people are amazing individuals and I love each one of you with everything that is me.
secondly, I’d like to thank my children; because although they will never see this any time in the near future; They ARE the reason I am still alive today. Thank you for loving me unconditionally and inspiring me to be well and never stop no matter what. You are the greatest gifts of my life, and I can’t even imagine one day without you. You all three are completely amazing, beautiful children. I love you more than you could ever know; and I always will.
Lastly, Thank you to my angel baby Karter; who sits on my left broken shoulder, and is always there to watch over me when I am not feeling well, and need the strength. Mommy will be OK.
I know you know this already 🙂 ❤